Wednesday, April 2, 2008

Talk about pathetic...

So, I finally got around to writing my resume last night. I've been meaning to do it for a while, but what actually happened was that the tutoring company that I've been working with for the past four years needed a copy of my resume. (They said they are being audited by one of the school district clients, so I'm guessing that they just need to prove that all the people the taxpayers are paying to help their students with math are, you know, competent.) The embarrassing thing is that my resume only takes up half a page. I think it actually took me longer to select a typeface than it did to write down my relevant experience.

People, it has three bullet points on it.

1. I went to college. (We're still paying for it. We probably always will be.) 2. I worked in a lab for a little while, actually using my degree like some sort of adult. That didn't last long, since I got pregnant and then got laid off in rapid succession. 3. I started tutoring a little while after that. I'm actually planning to hang on to this job for as long as I can because it's one of the few professions you can do in your pajamas. Not that I make a ton of money, but it pays for my scrapbook supplies, and it feels good to have an income right now.

And that's it. Sure, I had a lot of jobs before then (most memorably, I worked the switchboard at Butler and scooped ice cream for two summers) but they are completely irrelevant to my qualifications for, well, anything. I only wish that I was allowed to list all the other things I've been doing for the past seven years.

  • Made three people from scratch
  • Had some scrapbook pages published
  • Hammer Pants
  • Learned how to make risotto
  • Used the phrase "Because I said so" in a non-ironic fashion
  • Blogged

I think I'd be a pretty impressive candidate for any job, don't you think? (And speaking of resumes, many congratulations to Susan and Beth on their new jobs! You gals rock!)

2 witty remarks on "Talk about pathetic..."

Amy on 1:28 PM said...

you just crack me up! "three people from scratch". i laughed out loud. and hey that in and of itself is a ton of work and accomplishment.

katorigasuki on 8:33 AM said...

you can, actually list your publications. that should give you a couple more lines.

also, if you put a "Skills" section, you can list things like: managing a budget, organizational skills, creativity, and anything else you can translate from your job as a homemaker and stay at home mom into life and job skills.


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