Thursday, October 25, 2007

Is it wrong to be excited about this?


I got a new vacuum cleaner this week and it's purple.

No, not a Dyson. I didn't feel like trading in my firstborn just to get my floors clean. (Get my floors clean and fold the laundry... you may have a deal.) But the nice thing is, since the Dyson has been out for a few years, the technology has started to trickle down into more affordable vacuums. Also, they're making them cuter.

Our old vacuum gave up the ghost this weekend; I'm fairly sure it's at least indirectly related to the 43 pounds of dead spiders Matt sucked up with it in the basement. Turns out, that's not good for your appliances. But, I got the old vacuum for free from my friend a few years ago - when she got a Dyson - so it was probably on its last legs anyway. So I did some comparison internet shopping on Sunday night and decided on this one, not only because of its color (which the manufacturer describes as Black Cherry Fizz. Mmm, dusty soda.) but also because I could get it online from Linens & Things with a 20% off coupon. I had it delivered to the store for free shipping and picked it up on Tuesday morning.

And let me tell ya, this thing really sucks. (Get it? Because it's a vacuum.) I was astonished at the quantity of dirt, fuzz, and dust it sucked out of my supposedly clean (okay, sorta clean) carpets. And sand. Where on earth is sand coming from? We live in Indiana, not Arizona. I've been doing a lot more vacuuming than usual this week.

Let me tell you, if it's wrong to be excited, then I don't want to be right.

I also got to go to my OB's office this week to solve the mystery of the random stabbing pains that have been waking me up at night. The good news is, there's nothing obvious wrong with me. The bad news is, there's nothing obvious wrong with me. But the baby is fine, so I'll take that.

I've actually seen this baby three times already on ultrasound, for various reasons. It's pretty interesting to see it develop almost in real time. At ten weeks, it still had a yolk sac and the characteristic giant alien head. Now it actually looks like a very small person, complete with ribcage and little tiny vertebrae. Think about it: sixteen weeks ago he was two cells, and now he's got bones. Hundreds of bones. No wonder I've been so sleepy lately.

The ultrasound tech was actually looking for ovarian cysts, which fortunately I don't have any of. Seeing my little peanut was just a bonus. The dialogue went something like this:

JONI: What's that?

ULTRASOUND LADY: That's bowel gas.

JONI: Ohh, nice. What's that?

ULTRASOUND LADY: That's your ovary.

JONI: Cool. Hey, I know what that is! That's my baby!

I'm sure I annoyed the crap out of her, but she's gotta be used to me by now. And I love anyone who puts the gel in a nice little warmer so it doesn't shock your poor delicate tummy-skin. I'll be going back in another month or so - I'm pretty sure I'm 16 weeks pregnant right now - and we can find out the sex. Although Ultrasound Lady told me that the baby had its legs closed, so I'm pretty sure it's a girl.

So, to summarize: New vacuum cleaner. Baby vertebrae. Bowel gas.

10 witty remarks on "Is it wrong to be excited about this?"

Anonymous said...

Joni, though you live in IN, you DO have a sandbox on your back patio. I'm thinking that just MIGHT be where the sand is coming from.

Anonymous said...

I would have bought that vacum because it is PURPLE!! My favorite!! Glad to hear all is well with the littlest Lynn! O and about the sand...did you check the kids suitcases when you got home from Florida?? Just making sure they didn't bring our "dirt" home to play in....lol Trish

Anonymous said...

Um,Joni, you have a sandbox.No small wonder you have sand.

Anonymous said...

I think I'll jump on the bandwagon...

JONI....YOU HAVE A SANDBOX!!

There, now that that is over with, I'll get on with it. I know you just want me to. I can hear your comments in my head. Is that bad? Or maybe I just need to stop talking to you....nahh...I like the comedy hour of women things.

I like the vacuum....I dont use ours anymore since I have linolium (did I spell that right? Probably not) and hardwood...no carpets. Oh well...it just means I have to sweep more, and when Gavin's older, mop more. Ugh...I think I'll get an area rug/carpet thing. That way I dont have to do the floors as much..and he wont get as dirty.

Anyway, I will probably talk to you again soon...glad to know, again, that the baby is doing well. Oh, and you too. Love ya!

Anonymous said...

so you're not going to jump on the "not-finding-out-the-sex" bandwagon?

bummer. i was looking forward to "Christmas" in April.

susan opel on 5:47 PM said...

Beth is a total clean-a-holic, so she is right there with you on the new vacuum. And Black Cherry Fizz is a great name. And I was totally thinking to myself, "I bet it's from the sandbox (that I don't even know for sure that you have, but I assumed because what mother of small children would be without one?).

And YAY about being pub buddies! That rocks super-duper hard!

Anonymous said...

Finding out the gender? Who does that anymore? Seriously. Hasn't the novelty of sonogram technology worn off yet? It's like those late 80's GM cars that had the Dashboard Computers that told you how much fuel range you had left based on your fuel consumption this very instant and whether you were going N or NE. Everyone was all, "Ooh, technology," and then about six months later they were all, "Ooh, lame" and moved on. I mean, you could cut right to the chase and find out that 24 years from now, the 'lil scamp will move into your attic and sell shoes part-time after having spent five years at a private university without earning a degree -- but that would take all the magic out of it, wouldn't it?

Oh, and whatever you do, do something about all that sand on the floor. I don't have a clue where it's coming from, but it's no place for a newborn of any gender.

Anonymous said...

My van actually does do that - although it's not on the dashboard, it's in the roof. I always forget I have that feature. I do like the onboard compass though. We have to find out the sex because it will affect our buying habits - in other words, if it's a girl, no Christmas presents for the kids!

And yes, I DO have a sandbox, but I've also vacuumed since then. My old vacuum wasn't sucking it up. My new vacuum rocks.

"Gakye" is my word verification so you all know.

Anonymous said...

You know dear, if you have a girl, I'm sure presents will be purchased, so the little dear won't have to go nekkid. Surprises are so much more fun.

Oh, and Mike....I think selling shoes might have helped cement the idea that you should go to law school, so as not to have to deal with all those nice refined ladies at Kaufmanns.

gskvgc...a Russian babys first word?

Anonymous said...

The way I see it, it's a surprise either way. It can be a surprise in December or a surprise in April. And giving birth was still pretty darn exciting even when I already knew what kind of equipment the baby was coming with.

Jwsgbd.

 

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